# An Appreciation for Emotional Labor By:: [[Brian Heath]] 2022-10-08 When I was younger I dreaded the small talk that often came with getting a haircut. I thought it was an unnecessary expectation for both parties. It was extra work for both parties. However, I've grown accustomed to the tradition and have learned to appreciate it on several levels. First, we are both humans, and it's in our nature to communicate the struggles that come with living. It's a respectful nod to our humanity and validates the unique journey each of us is on. I think this is being a good human, but I'm still learning. The other part I've recently grown to appreciate is the emotional labor that this small talk represents. Emotional labor is the expectation of being nice and friendly at work because it is part of the job. I believe most people are intuitively aware of emotional labor as we expect the customer service representative, the doctor, and the barber to be positive and happy. We never explicitly think about it, but we notice when it doesn't happen and request to speak to the supervisor. In many transactions, we are paying for someone to be nice to us. This strikes me as obvious and extremely weird at the same time. On one level, emotional labor could be seen as basic human decency. Doesn't society benefit if everyone engages positively with each other? On another level, emotional labor could be viewed as wasted energy that takes a large toll on segments of the population. If you had to be nice at work all the time, would you have enough energy to be nice to others outside of work? I'm not a great person to be around after long days of emotional labor at work - just ask my wife. Physical and emotional labor is equally taxing on us, so would it be better if we just eliminated emotional labor as a work requirement? All of these are interesting questions to consider but need to acknowledge what makes us human and how we make progress [[together]]. After all, we can't even make the most mundane decisions if the emotional part of our brain is damaged. So, [[emotions]] are part of our humanity and cultural expectations. As with most things, once you give it an explicit name, you start to think about it differently. Emotional labor and its toll have made me better appreciate the challenges associated with work. As a customer, expending a little bit of emotional labor is the least I can do to express my [[gratitude]] for the tremendous effort many of these individuals give each day. #### Related Items [[Work]] [[The Human Condition]] [[Emotional Labor]] [[Society]]